Ya, I don’t much like focusing on ND specifically either. The thing is, though, to my eyes ND people have been booted out disproportionately.
I’ve never been diagnosed, or even assessed, for any form of ND - but I was well into middle age before “neurodiversity” was first coined. In my day I was most often tagged as a “troublemaker” with “a bad attitude”. Many of the things the self-identified ND posters here have said about their experiences resonate deeply and personally. But I don’t claim to be ND - I just think I am, but not at an extreme on any of the ND axes. Now I’m too old to care about labeling myself one way or the other 
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I see the CoC WG has an affiliated group of “Advisers”. How about a group of ND volunteers to act as advisers to the mods? For example, @AnnaRaven mentioned that she’s been consulted (in a different context) on questions of whether or not ND was in play, and I’m pretty darned sure she’s better able to make an informed judgment about that than any but the most highly trained neurotypicals.
The idea of putting any newcomer making a problematic post into some form of “held for moderation” mode works for me. If NG advisers do volunteer, they can help decide what best to be done next.
I’d like that too. But I do think NG posters require more help. The procedures don’t have to call them out by name. From Brett’s posts, it’s clear that the mods are already trying to be clear, specific, and make suggestions.
They can try do so “even more”, but I doubt it would be enough to help the specific case that spurred me to start this topic. I do think he could have become a valued member of the community - he didn’t get a Discourse “Empathetic” badge for nothing. Like another poster here recently said, he was easily able to click the “heart” button to express his appreciation for others despite that finding appropriate words was a major internal struggle.
So same treatment for all works me, although recognizing that some people may well need significantly more help than others. The latter shouldn’t fall entirely on the mods, and I expect that making a good guess in advance about which people may need significantly more help is doable.